Excerpt for Erotic And Filthy Sex: Volume Fourteen - 6 Naughty Stories by , available in its entirety at Smashwords

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EROTIC AND FILTHY SEX: VOLUME FOURTEEN

6 NAUGHTY STORIES

Featuring stories from:

Teri Monroe

Spencer Hall

Nikki Watson

Nolan West

Nancy Evans

Belladonna Rose

Copyright 2018 by AE Publications

AE PUBLICATIONS

    Smashwords Edition, License Notes

This ebook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This ebook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each recipient. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please return to Smashwords.com and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of these authors.

DISCLAIMER: These stories are intended for a mature audience only! Contains explicit, graphic sex and language, including rough and aggressive sex, dirty talk, anal sex, alpha males, bdsm, femdom, and more. Not intended for individuals under the age of 18 or those with a weak constitution. All characters are over 18 years old.

 

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TABLE OF CONTENTS

DESTROYING HER ASS BY TERI MONROE

DEPRAVED EXAM BY SPENCER HALL

ONE HELL OF A NAUGHTY BABE BY NOLAN WEST

 THE FILTHY BABE PICKS UP A STRANGER BY NANCY EVANS

TESTED BY THE FILTHY MILF BY BELLADONNA ROSE

ONE FILTHY ESCORT BY CASEY ROTTEN


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DESTROYING HER ASS

TERI MONROE


Eric was pacing around the hotel room, anxiously awaiting Jasmine’s arrival, feeling a high-school kid getting ready for his first date. Only he was a 35-year old man, not a teenager, and he wasn’t picking up his girlfriend for dinner and a movie, he was waiting for an escort to arrive at his hotel room so they could partake in an hour-long session of perverted, deviant sex.

To say that he wasn’t planning on this turn of events would be an insult to understatements. When he first called Jasmine a few months back, it was supposed to be a one-time thing, a way to take out the frustrations caused by his greedy ex-wife and her blood-sucking lawyers on another girl without having to worry about the consequences. And for the first session, that’s all Jasmine was. A stand-in for his wife, someone he could degrade and punish in effigy. And punish her he did, doing things to her he’d never done to anyone before.

But he had so much fun that first session that he just had to call her for another one. And another after that. And then another. Until it had become a regular thing.

And as the sessions continued, they began to take on a different tone. Eric started seeing Jasmine as a person instead of just a stand-in for his ex. Not someone he wanted a relationship with (at least, not a traditional one) but someone that he enjoyed seeing.

They still had nasty, dirty, rough, aggressive, deviant sex, but it was no longer rooted in hate. It was rooted in pleasure. Pure, unadulterated pleasure. For both of them. (All right, so maybe she was just faking her enjoyment—after all, she was getting paid—but Eric didn’t think so. He was convinced that she truly did enjoy fucking. Not just him, of course, but anyone. Jasmine just flat out loved to fuck.)

Eric came to think of his time with Jasmine as an opportunity to experiment with all the sexual fantasies he’d held inside over the years. Something about the non-emotionality involved with paying an escort allowed him to get past the weird discomfort that had always dogged him when it came to getting freaky in the bedroom, and this, combined with Jasmine’s willingness to do literally anything, had freed him up to explore every single dirty, nasty, perverted thought that had ever entered his head. (And even a couple that, until Jasmine brought them up, hadn’t.)

So, in a way, he had reverted back to his high-school days, when everything seemed new and different and special. That he’d feel that way with someone he paid money to fuck was ironic, to say the least, but he figured it was better than nothing.

A whole lot better.

 

#

 

There’s a knock on the door. Eric forces himself to take a deep breath, then heads over and opens it.

Jasmine is standing there, looking as sexy as ever, with her thin, athletic, lithe body and cute, girlish face. She’s wearing a tiny bright orange dress that barely covers her ass, making her already long legs seem like they go on forever. She’s smiling, as always. And it’s genuine, as always.

She gives him a little peck on the cheek and walks past him, dropping her purse down on the end table, near the couch. When she turns back he’s already right on top of her.

He wraps his arm around her, hands on her ass, and starts kissing her. They make out for a few seconds before she pulls back, eyeing him curiously.

“My, we’re rearing to go tonight, aren’t we?” she says playfully, pushing her body up against his rock-hard cock.

“What can I say? I’ve been looking forward to this since the moment you walked out the door last time.”

“I have too,” Jasmine says.

He laughs. “You liar.”

She gives him a look like she’s trying to get out of getting caught with her hand in the cookie jar.

“You know what happens to liars,” Eric says, flashing her an evil grin.

“Of course I know,” she replies. “They get punished.”

“No,” he says. “They get severely punished.”

“Ooooh, even better,” she says. “What kind of punishment is in store for tonight?”

“You’ll just have to see, won’t you?”

“I can’t wait.”

Eric pulls the top of Jasmine’s dress down, revealing her perfect, perky little tits. He attaches his mouth to one of her nipples and sucks on it until it’s nice and hard.

“This doesn’t seem like a punishment to me,” she says. “It seems more like a reward.”

“I’m starting off slow,” he says, pulling his mouth off her nipple with a pop. It’s grown to the size of a pencil eraser. “I’m lulling you into a sense of relaxation by pleasuring you. The punishment will come later.”

He switches over to her other nipple and gives it the same treatment.

Jasmine moans in enjoyment and runs her hand down his stomach and starts rubbing his cock through his pants.

Eric returns the favor, running his hand down her body and hiking her dress up over her hips, revealing her black g-string panties. He rubs her pussy while still working her tits with his mouth. It isn’t long before she’s soaking through the cotton.

She grabs his head and lifts it towards her own then sticks her tongue down his throat and starts exploring his mouth.

He continues working her pussy while they make out, sliding her g-string to the side to give him direct access. He slips two fingers inside her pussy and starts banging her.

Jasmine moans more loudly and kisses him more aggressively, her hands now moving down to his belt, which she quickly undoes. His pants fall to the ground. She follows, dropping to her knees.

She goes to work on his cock, rubbing and licking it all over, not staying in the same place for more than a couple seconds, sucking on the tip, running her tongue down the length of his shaft, caressing his balls, then sucking on them for a bit, her eyes locked on his, looking up at him the entire time.

“You have such a beautiful cock,” Jasmine says in one of the rare times when her mouth isn’t full. “I love touching it and licking it and sucking it.”

And then she dives in with a proper blowjob, her red lips wrapped around his cock, moving up and down on his shaft in time with her hand, which is still jerking him off. Her blonde hair is thrown back, allowing him a perfect view of her pretty little face sucking his cock.

“You like how I suck it?” she says, not waiting for an answer before diving right back in, going hands-free this time. She takes him most of the way down her throat, holds it for a couple of seconds, then pulls back off and goes back to jerking him off, her eyes still locked on his.

He nods in response to her earlier question.

Smiling, she says, “That’s nothing, baby. I’m going to do things to you that you’ve never had done before,” then goes back to work, sliding her body further beneath him and taking his ballsack in her mouth.

“Godammit that feels fucking good,” Eric says as Jasmine sucks on his balls, bouncing them off each other in her mouth while her hand still works his cock.

After tea-bagging him for a bit she runs her tongue along the bottom of his sack, then scoots her body even further beneath him and starts licking his taint.

“Holy fucking shit,” he says without thinking. His legs feel like they’re going to buckle. His head feels like it’s going to explode.

She takes his words as a sign she’s doing something right and it gives her the confidence to take things to the next level. She scoots even further beneath him then turns around and runs her tongue over his asshole.

A bolt of lightning shoots up Eric’s spine. He lets out a piteous groan of pure pleasure and tries not to think too hard about what’s going on. Just sit back and enjoy it, he tells himself.

Jasmine licks his asshole for what seems like an eternity but is really only a few of seconds of objective time. Then she slides out the back of his legs.

A stab of disappointment hits him but before he has a chance to dwell on it, she gives him a good hearty slap on the ass.

“Down on the floor,” she says. “Hand and knees.”

He does as he’s told without hesitation.

“That’s a good boy,” she says.

Jasmine drops down to her hands and knees herself, then crawls in closer to him, grabs ahold of his asscheeks—one in each hand—spreads them apart and sticks her face between them, her tongue going to work on his asshole.

He turns his head to the side and uses the mirrored wall of the closet to watch the proceedings from a third-person view. This excites him even further.

“Goddamn you’re a filthy little slut,” Eric says while she tosses his salad, running her tongue up his asshole over and over again while her hands play with his cock and balls continuously.

She lifts her head up, sees him watching in the mirror, and gives him a wink. “I told you before,” she says with a smile. “I’m the filthiest.” Then she dives back in.

Eric laughs softly and shakes his head. He takes a deep breath and lets it out slowly, trying to regulate his excitement. He’s pathetically unsuccessful.

Afraid he’s going to cum way too quickly, he crawls forward a couple of steps to escape her grasp and turns around to face her.

“What’s the matter?” she asks, her face a mask of fake innocence. She’s up on her knees, her back straight. “You didn’t like that?”

“I loved it,” he says, walking on his knees towards her. “A bit too much, actually.”

“Aaahhh, I get it,” she says, her face blooming into a smile. “You poor boys. You only get to cum once and then you need a break.”

“Exactly,” he says. “Unlike you girls who get to cum as many times as you want.”

“It doesn’t seem fair, does it?” Jasmine says.

“No it doesn’t,” Eric says as he again attaches his mouth to one of her nipples and starts to hungrily suck on it. They’re just so perfect and inviting he can’t keep his mouth off them.

She lets out a sexy little moan and runs her hand down her body and slides her panties down her legs and starts rubbing her clit. Her moans grow louder.

He gives Jasmine’s protruding nipple a little bite, eliciting a sharp gasp of pleasure from her, then moves to the other one to give it the same treatment. After he sucks on it for a bit then gives it a little bite too, Eric pulls back and grabs ahold of his cock and jerks off while watching her play with her clit.

Jasmine notices Eric watching her and slips two fingers inside her pussy.

“You like that, don’t you?” she says, her eyes locked onto his, her hand working feverishly, moving in and out of her pussy. “You like watching me fuck myself?”

“I fucking love it,” he says.

“You want to see another one in there?” she asks.

He nods.

Smiling, her eyes not leaving his, Jasmine slips another finger inside her pussy, biting down on her bottom lip as it goes in. It takes a few seconds to loosen up but pretty soon she’s moving all three fingers in and out of her pussy as quickly as she was moving two just moments before.

Eric reaches out with his free hand and smacks down on her left tit. The sound fills the room.

She yelps and goes to work even more feverishly on herself, obviously turned on by the slapping.

He smacks her other tit and gets the same result.

“Do it again,” Jasmine says breathlessly. “Please do it again.”

He obliges, smacking one tit, waiting a couple of seconds, then smacking the other.

Moaning with pleasure, her free hand flies down and goes to work on her clit while the other continues banging herself.

He slaps her tits again. One, then the other.

And again.

And again.

With every slap Jasmine attacks herself even more intensely, both arms moving faster and faster, her fingers digging in more and more aggressively, until finally she reaches that point which she’s been seeking. She freezes up for a moment, then utters a high-pitched wordless scream as her body shakes and shimmies as the orgasm overtakes her.

Smiling, Jasmine slides her soaking wet fingers out of her pussy and sticks them in her mouth and licks them clean of her juices.

“There’s number one,” she says. “Ready to try for another?”

“That’s so not fair,” he says.

She laughs and offers a little shrug. “What can I say? Life’s not fair.”

“You do realize I’m going to have to punish you to make up for the inequity of this world.”

“If you insist,” she says with a smile.

Eric smacks her tit one last time for good measure then climbs to his feet and steps towards her.

“Look at me,” he says.

She does.

Standing over her, he stares down at her pretty little smiling face and wonders how such a beauty could be such a filthy little slut. No matter how it happened, he considered himself a lucky man for having hooked up with her.

“Hands behind your back,” Eric says.

Jasmine obliges.

He grabs ahold of his cock and smacks her cheek with it a few times. Then he switches sides and smacks her other cheek with it.

Her smile grows wider.

“You like getting smacked around, don’t you?” Eric says.

Jasmine bites down on her bottom lip and nods.

“Open your mouth,” he says.

She does as she’s told without hesitation.

He grabs the back of her head and pulls it towards him, guiding his hard cock into her mouth.

She wraps her lips around it.

“Keep your mouth open,” Eric says.

She instantly opens it back up.

He shuffles forward a little, giving him more leverage, then proceeds to fuck Jasmine’s face, slamming his cock in and out of her mouth while his hands grip the back of her head.

Gurgling sounds come from Jasmine’s throat as Eric slams his cock into her mouth. Her face is tilted upwards, allowing her to maintain eye contact the entire time. Her eyes are wide and full of enjoyment; she truly does get off on this kind of thing.

Eric pummels Jasmine’s mouth, his balls slapping up against her cheek with every pump, her eyes never leaving his. A few more thrusts and then he slams it deep into her throat and holds it there, choking her, causing tears to leak out of her eyes.

She gags and coughs but makes no attempt to pull away, apparently content to deepthroat him for as long as he can take it. He releases her head, allowing her the ability to pull off whenever she needs to.

But instead of pulling off his cock Jasmine pushes her head forward, taking him even further down her throat. Her nose is pressing up against his belly and her tongue is flicking out from beneath his cock to tickle his balls as she deepthroats him.

“Holy fuck,” Eric says in a breathless burst. He’s never gotten head like this before. Not even from Jasmine. She’s on top of her game tonight.

Finally, after what seems like forever she pulls back, releasing his cock from her throat and allowing herself a chance to breathe. She takes a few deep, gasping breaths and then looks up at him.

“You are fucking amazing,” he says.

“I know,” she replies with a smirk. “You want me to do it again?”

“So I can blow my load already?” he says. “Hell no. I need to take a little break. Besides, it’s time for me to return the favor.”

“If you insist,” she says, her smile growing wider.

Eric reaches down and picks Jasmine up, lifting her with ease, and throws her up over his shoulder like she was a sack of potatoes. A very sexy sack of potatoes.

She laughs and slaps his ass while he carries her over to the other side of the room.

Eric tosses Jasmine down onto the couch, lengthwise. She lands on her back, still laughing softly. He grabs her by the waist and flips her over so she’s on her stomach, then lifts her ass into the air. Her dress is still hiked up around her waist but he leaves it there. Something about fucking a girl while she’s still clothed turns him on.

Jasmine slides her knees under herself, hikes up onto her hands and arches her back, lifting her ass further into the air. Turning her head back towards him, she says, “Is this how you want me? On my hands and knees so you can fuck me from behind?”

“That’s exactly how I want you,” Eric says, looking down at her perfect, tight little ass sticking up right below him, her asshole gaping slightly and beckoning him. “Don’t you fucking move.”

 He bends down so his face is at the same level as her ass and mere inches away. He grabs her panties and pulls them down and slips them off her legs. He stares at her pussy and asshole for a moment, taking them in, reveling in their beauty, then goes to work.

He starts with her pussy, gently licking from the bottom up like a puppy drinking from its water bowl. Long, slow strokes, no penetration at all, just getting her warmed up for the main course. His hands are tenderly rubbing her ass cheeks.

Jasmine seems to enjoy it, shimmying beneath him and breathing more heavily with every pass he makes.

Once he’s gotten her good and riled up Eric starts going at it a little more aggressively, sticking his tongue deeper inside her as he runs it up her pussy and groping her cheeks with a little more force.

Faster and faster he moves, his tongue going deeper and deeper, her moans getting louder and more visceral, until pretty soon her ass is bouncing against his face, his rigid tongue slamming into her pussy, her salty sweetness covering his face, her ass smothering him, her juices dripping into his mouth, running down the back of his tongue and into his throat.

Jasmine reaches back and grabs the back of his head and pulls him further into her pussy, repaying his treatment of her earlier.

Eric shakes his head quickly from side to side and digs in, sticking his tongue as far into her as it will go and moving it rapidly up and down and side to side. The ridge of his nose is pressed up against her asshole.

“Yes, yes, yes!” she screams. “Right there, right fucking there!”

He’s having trouble breathing but Eric doesn’t slow down, doesn’t give in. He just keeps his face buried in Jasmine’s pussy, his tongue working feverishly while she presses on the back of his head, keeping him deep inside her, suffocating him, making it almost impossible to breathe.

“Don’t stop I’m gonna fucking cum don’t stop don’t you dare fucking stop!” she screams in a breathless rush. “Holy fuck holy fuck holy fuuuuuucccckkkkkkk!”

Her entire body shudders and a rush of her juices drench him even further as her orgasm overwhelms her.

Eric feels the pressure on the back of his head relax and he pulls his face back and takes a couple of deep breaths. Then, before she has a chance to fully recover, he spreads her ass cheeks wide, takes a deep breath, and buries his face in her ass.

“Ohmyfuckinggod,” Jasmine says, sounding like she’s going to explode.

Eric licks her asshole a few times, pulls back a little bit, spits on it, and goes back to work, licking her tender flesh between her pussy and asshole for a moment before sliding his tongue back up to lick her asshole proper.

He works her asshole with the tip of his tongue for  a little while, loosening it up, until it’s big enough for him to slip his rigid tongue inside it.

Jasmine yelps and her body buckles and her ass shakes.

Eric stays the course, pushing his tongue further inside her asshole, causing her moans to grow even louder.

With his tongue in her asshole he can see over the top of her ass and down the length of her body as she strains against the pleasure, her back arched, her skin dappled with sweat, her head tilted up, throwing her hair down over her back, tempting him, begging to be pulled.

Unable to resist, he grabs a handful of her hair and gives it a yank, arching her back even further and forcing her to press her ass more forcefully against his face, allowing his tongue even deeper access to her asshole.

With her head pulled back and her neck stretched tight, Jasmine’s groans turn guttural and wordless; expressions of pure bliss unaccompanied by any kind of rational thought process.

But Eric’s still not done.

With his free hand he slides two fingers inside her pussy, giving her yet another point of pleasure. With his tongue in her ass, his hand yanking her hair and his fingers in her pussy it isn’t long before she cums again.

Jasmine shudders against him, her body shaking and shimmying and another wordless scream coming from her throat.

Once that passes Eric lets go of her hair, giving her a little bit of respite. But he keeps his tongue in her ass and his fingers inside her pussy.

“Please fuck me,” Jasmine begs, turning her upper body to face him. The words come in short bursts, between shuddering breaths. “I need your cock inside me. Please give it to me.”

Eric’s thoroughly enjoying making her squirm and doesn’t want to let up quite yet, so he sticks another finger inside her and bangs her pussy for a little longer before finally giving in to her request.

He pulls his fingers out of her pussy and slides his tongue out of her ass. He rises up and puts one knee up on the couch and leaves the other foot on the floor so he’s half-standing, then positions himself directly behind her ass and slips his cock into her pussy.

Eric tries to start off slow but Jasmine’s so wet and slippery from all the licking and sucking that it’s nearly impossible. His cock glides in and out of her pussy with barely a hint of resistance as he fucks her, his hips slamming into her ass, making it bounce and jiggle with every thrust.

He grabs her shoulders and uses them to pull her back into him at the bottom of every pump, increasing the force in which their bodies are slamming against one another.

“There you go,” Jasmine says. “Right there. Right fucking there.”

One of Eric’s hands slides up her neck and grabs a handful of her hair and gives it a yank, pulling Jasmine’s head back as he fucks her.

Her back is arched and her shoulder blades are showing through her skin.

He slaps her ass with his free hand.

“That’s right, baby,” Jasmine says. “Spank me.”

Eric slaps her ass again.

“Punish me,” she says, her head turning back to look at him. “I’ve been a bad girl and I need to be punished.”

He releases her hair and slaps her ass again. With both hands this time. One for each cheek.

Jasmine yelps and shakes her head from side to side, causing her hair to fly around and her body to shake beneath him.

But Eric doesn’t stop fucking her. He doesn’t even slow down. He slaps her ass again. And again. And again until both cheeks are bright red.

“Yes, yes, yes!” Jasmine screams.

He stops spanking her ass and slows down for a moment to catch his breath.

But she keeps on working, moving her ass back against his cock, doing all the work while he remains still.

Eric turns his head and uses the mirror to watch their bodies come together from a different angle.

Jasmine looks in the mirror and sees him watching.

“You like it when I back my tight little ass up against you?” she says, her voice higher-pitched than usual. “You like it when I do all the work?”

“I love it.”

“Yeah?” she says. “You want me to do it harder?”

“Yeah.”

“Yeah?” Jasmine says, slamming back into him more forcefully, her voice taunting him, teasing him, torturing him. “Like this?”

He nods and watches in the mirror as she backs into him even more aggressively.

And then Eric can’t take it anymore. He grabs her ass cheeks and spreads them and proceeds to once again take control, slamming into her hard enough to move her body forward with every thrust.

With her ass cheeks spread wide, Jasmine’s asshole is beckoning. Loosened up from the action earlier in the evening it’s spread wider than usual, not quite gaping but not completely closed either. It’s just begging to be played with.

Eric gathers up some saliva and spits on Jasmine’s asshole, then starts working it with his thumb, rubbing the outside for a little while then sliding it in and moving it around inside, loosening it up, getting it ready.

After Jasmine’s asshole is nice and loose he slides his thumb in as far as it will go, still slamming his cock into her all the while.

Her groans grow louder, more intense, as does her bucking, just like they do every time he starts playing with her ass. Even though she’s never actually come out and said it, he’s pretty sure she likes anal sex more than vaginal.

“You like my thumb in your ass, don’t you?” Eric says.

“I fucking love it,” Jasmine replies, turning her head back to look at him.

“But what you really want is my cock in there,” he says. “Isn’t that right? You want me to fuck your ass with my big cock.”

“Yes.”

“Yes what?”

“Yes please,” Jasmine says.

“I don’t know,” he says with fake ambivalence as he slams up against her even more aggressively. Hearing her beg always turns him on. “I don’t think I believe you.”

“Please, please, please give it to me,” she says, her voice an exaggerated high-pitched whine. “I want your cock in my ass. Please give it to me. I want it.”

“You want it?” he says, playing out the string as long as he can. “Or you need it?”

“I need it,” Jasmine says, full-on begging now. “I need your cock in my ass.”

“Well, if you insist,” Eric says with mock reluctance.

And with that, he slips his thumb out of her asshole, then pulls his cock out of her pussy and slides it into her asshole. Even though it’s a tight fit it slips in easily, with all the ass play they’ve had tonight it’s more than lubed up enough without any outside help.

But still, Eric doesn’t move against her at first. He lets Jasmine do all the work in the beginning, allowing her the chance to get her asshole loosened up before he starts fucking her ass proper.

She starts slowly, moving her ass back against him in short, deliberate strokes. As her asshole opens up the strokes become longer and it isn’t long before she’s taking his entire cock in her ass, from tip to base, in smooth, slow strokes.

“That’s it, baby,” he says, his eyes locked on her ass as it swallows his cock whole. “Work that ass. Fuck my cock with that tight little ass of yours.”

She starts bucking more aggressively against him, her ass bouncing off his body, his balls slapping against her pussy as his cock goes balls deep into her ass.

“Like that?” Jasmine says, turning back to look at him.

“Just like that,” he replies.

After a few more thrusts he’s had enough of her doing the work. It’s time to take control. Eric brings his other leg up onto the couch to give him more leverage and grabs ahold of Jasmine’s hips and starts slamming his cock into her, pummeling her ass like a wildman.

“Just like that, just like that,” Jasmine says, the words coming out in a breathless rush. “Stretch that tight fucking ass out. Yes, yes, yes!”

His hands slide up her back to her shoulders and press down on them.

 Jasmine gets the hint, relaxing her arms and dropping her head down to the couch. She turns her head so half of her face is lying flat on the cushion while the other is turned to the side, watching him fuck her ass in the reflection of the mirror.

Eric’s legs are starting to tighten up so he scoots his feet further forwards, changing the angle and giving him even more leverage. Squatting over Jasmine now, he hammers away at her ass, pounding her with everything he has.

Jasmine runs her arms backwards and grabs ahold of her asscheeks and spreads them wide, stretching her ass, opening her asshole up even further.

“Ohmygod,” she screams as Eric fucks her. “You’re gonna make me fucking cum! FUCKFUCKFUCK!”

Jasmine’s body shakes and shimmies beneath him, her head moving back and forth, her hair flying everywhere. She lets out a wordless groan and then her body bucks a couple of times and then falls still, her breath coming in ragged bursts.

Taking mercy on her, Eric slides his cock out of her ass, climbs off her and sits down on the couch, giving Jasmine a moment to catch her breath.

“Holy shit,” she says, rolling over until she’s sitting normally on the couch next to him. Her breathing is still deep and ragged but almost under control. “That was fucking incredible.”

“What’s that? Orgasm number four for you?” he says, looking over at her with a little smirk.

“Five, actually,” she says.

He shakes his head. “That is so unfair.”

“Like I said before, that’s life.”


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