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Bleeding Memories

Anges de vie

(angels of life)

To one paradise imagined

Flew the angel in disguise

Scaring every single creature

That was passing by.

Was it possible for someone to prospect, then make protrude,

All the beauty ever after

That was circling the truth?

Here is said to have a good flight

This old angel in disguise,

Then this way was true and honest,

Honestly dancing to say goodbye

To a horror film that wasn’t all too frightening after all,

Only too annoying living,

Singing, playing for the one

Who would have destroyed her Soul,

One who tried to murder them all.

Left behind forever hollow

Trying to become her All;

Thinking he might get that chance to

Hurt her and them all

Once more.

Through the windows in my head though

There are doors that open clearly

Showing paths that carry stone

On the surface of a glasslike

Shiny armour.

“- You’ll all see one day how it feels

to be left alone and cold

because shown:

You’re not the one!”

  • Do not tell me,

Please don’t tell me,

That love doesn’t mean to you


And shouldn’t mean a thing

To me either!

Don’t you dare to bless me, hollow,

With your cold existence lie!”

But the cold has gotten to me

And I learned I’m better off with friendship

And a cup of cold white chocolate;

‘still prefer the dark one, though!

I also remember I shouted back at him:

“- Don’t tell me that no one really cares

because that’s not me

nor him,

Not us! Don’t you see?

Your Moronic Highness!

It was your choice to keep away from our beliefs!”

The man had no reason though to adhere to my belief!

So now I am watching out

One window of one past

That was promised to me when I could not understand

‘Why his disgust for love!?’

The perfumes of nature recycling to amaze

The innocent wisdom

The all-knowing make sense!

Interests in deluxe editions

Of absurd theories on lust,

Then what I could identify as a passion

Was one reused stardust.

In simple charge-term, the less you’re loved by the positive

the more (love) you gain on the negative… and vice-versa;

Until we are much more than we ever dreamed or hoped for!”

Time to State!



to what & whom

Beloved Universe,

A fool creating incessantly,


power over death and killing

of any kind!

It is time to state:



New world of





Oh, please,


in those who laughed

at and with you,

in those who cared....

Believe in everything you

once felt for,

in me, in them...


Please, do


Baby, I was so mad about you!

That’s why I started throwing with dishes


to you!

- Now, why are you throwing with candles at me?

- Because I ran out

of dishes.

Failed to fail,

In love, again,

with our Poem!

Saved from Myself

& the ones who knew

how to harm us!

Thank You!



This fascination of yours for the blown-up

made me wonder!


Tired of crying for you,

for myself;

Tired of listening to another whining song,

Tired of telling my troubles to a friend,

Finding relief in the art

which in shame

found Holiness

of its own.

Pride of the Divine!

I am not what you can see,

I am much more than you can feel

or breathe!

Those selfish cuts of mine,

in the air, they fly

& find purposes to make a fruits’ despair

look equal to the power of a will!

For the sake of a new beginning,

For this beautiful ending,

An Ouverture to a song that’s the sentence

to a wonderful, most beautiful hell...


... of a Thousand Lakes,

the friends of the mirror of Light

from where we get our strength,

our illusions and lies,

our faith!

A miracle performing sublimely well!

Subliminal friendly knowledge

you will submerge yourself into!

“I have the power to make myself

the tool I deserve to be”:


This kindergarten work...

If you want this shell

only to serve you well,

bring fake admiration,

some trouble to make your pride

feel stronger


You’re wrong!


My best is something beyond this smile

that I force into liking

your fake old side!

I’ll go make my own Fake,

sorry, but I have learned

not to trust anyone!

You wanted me dead,

didn’t you?


This kindergarten work of mine...!

No matter how hard I tried

or how much I cried,

you didn’t listen...

Here, I’m confessing, once more:

It was my stupid pride weeping,

I admit!

It was my pride trying to show gratitude

for the little I had!

My pride was the one making me get better...

I tried...!


This fascination of yours for the blown-up things!

Thank you!

Holy Stimuli


Distracted somehow by thoughts on fantasies

in which your realities take a step back,


we collide.

Apparently friendly,

still they seem deadly

to me.

Meanwhile you were giving life of beauty.

low, pathetic & fun

or not,

Here we are,

moving along with our story-telling.

Out of reflections of light spread all down

into the air,

the beans on the surface

go straight into your hell.

Outer-space trance,

Shining with grace


our tales on this Invincible Icarus

We have embraced.

Distracting somehow and pleasant a feel;

Engaging myself in the making & working



in which

Realities collide.


Sequenced Love

Amused by the gradient paths of a life

that has promised a come-back

for more!

A word about justice into this world


Glorious Fame!

Unbearable Fairy-tale

to the paradoxical shame,

An outwear

On the top of the Holy Square!




The house of your Brain:

we share!

Some thoughts still worth being implemented

into that lunatic’s shell!

Go safe and sane with The Holy Brain!

Pathetic or not, here we shine!

Story-tellers of what we felt as divine,

Reflections of this Icarus Flight!


Die living high

along with your lie,

Up into the sky

You fly!


Live everywhere your mystic pride,

the truth inside your beautiful soul!



Making conversation

for the sake of ‘our creation’!

A roll-up of truth

Caught-up on the roof,

Not showing feelings for a mud-flap

On this refined old great set-up!

That’s life!

I will keep my opinion

on how things should have been.



(at & about)

Types of Light


The Finest Set_up


You Offer!

Thank You!

I cannot be honest enough when I’m doing plain thinking!

Lovely stay in the memory of the lady in grey.

TkA SStudio

“I left the elephants. I left them for a while now. They remember too much about the whole deal and the troubles I had and make me remember what I don’t want to know anymore, about life and problems and killing, atrocities and personal issues. They remember too much and get to be annoying. I know now why is that I never liked myself much either! It’s because I’m also an elephant … a renegade, perhaps, still an elephant. I used to think myself better or that I could be better, improve or get to evolve. Sometimes, when I look into the mirror I believe that I did evolve. There are two legs and two arms and I have a head that’s pretty well structured. My designer was great. I look pretty well now; just like a regular human only an elephant mind with a view that’s too far for the destiny set by the nature of things; my views go the giraffe way, far, far away!

I also learned how to behave. I don’t toss and smash and crush all the things in my surroundings when I panic, anymore; and I don’t break the cups of tea when they try to teach me how to hold one. Now, to be honest, I don’t even know how on earth I could break anything anymore because, you see, I don’t panic anymore; I don’t get scared or impressed. This place …! … and I don’t care much for many; only the few. I have a distinguished silhouette, now! I look like the fancy young girls on TV and tabloids; everyone wishes to be one of them or with one of them around here; depending on the gender and orientation. This thing with the orientation is interesting though! You see, I still like that animal side of me telling me that I should go for a male and not a female… it’s cold though since I’m too young. I guess that is written in my DNA. They have a scientific explanation about everything around here which is fascinating. And if you won’t find a scientific one you should go to the less developed places on earth where small communities will talk to you about God and how he made the world… if you don’t find science fascinating you’ll find God!

Some say though that through science they found God while others claim to have found God through science. Some are nice people others are cruel but when all put together things start sparkling and everyone seems to be better than anyone! I believe that they are all crazy and I’m scared of some of them because they sometimes get angry when they don’t manage to make one believe - or at least pretend to believe - in what they say. It can be very annoying.

They call me Susan around here but I don’t like it; I’m going to call myself Eliraffe. It’s a more appropriate name for me. Now, if you excuse me, I’ll have to leave you with some lyrics or poetry or whatever they might call this… (oh, yeah! Waste of time, some said!). I think that I started growing some feathers; they seem to be swan feathers and it’s strange since yesterday they were only white. Now some black ones appeared. At least they’re sticking to the natural colours of nature. B-bye now, before some green ones get out of me!”

The New Technology Bracelet

Dissonant happiness star-gaze too bright,

Finding solutions to the splattered path of a life

That’s been chosen

For you to live,

You didn’t quite have the chance to leave!

How could you possibly think

That there was any choice that you could have made on your own?

They wouldn’t accept that,

Wouldn’t like you so


Force yourself to be happy in dissonance;

It’s okay to be mad at times and break a few things

Just not humans,

And do not kill

The ones that try to kill you;

Most certainly not a good call to punish those who mistreated you all,

Just who do you think you are?

Let them live in wealth and with your dreams all fulfilled

Based on your perpetual sorrow

And fear

You keep on forgiving, forgetting the past!

  • It was meant to last! This was meant to last!

There is no reason to get mad

For any of us!

What’s right?

A flower on a tree that talked

Spoke truly:

Since everything starts with a statement,

Here I go, beginning our bracelet-song:

I’m not a flower on your grave,

I am the tree that walked away!

I am the Moon that found the Sun

To be a most lovely brother

And not the naughty boy

I once covered for.

I am the one who got reborn,

Bright, fully leaved

And left to leave

Because I learned to have to learn

Once more:

I am and always was a star!

‘Keep seeing me in dreams that matter to the world,

as brilliant as a star

I’ll shine and offer to you all

The inspiration that I get

From my old call!

I’m not a flower on your grave,

You do not own my soul and senses!

You shall not take my spirit away,

Your will is going to subject to my will!

I will not wither on your grave!
Be sure of that my lovely wife

Of heaven!

Then she has spoken to him

Right back:

You’ll never be alone and sad,

You’ll always have what you desired;

Only Me

You will not have!

This trap you perfectly created

For a humiliating process

To make the woman

Be your guy

When thing get fishy and you need to fly


It is I the one who will not be

A flower on your grave!

My dying lie!

Surfer Cube

I will look up for those tears I shed

To surf above and master my skills

To Miss Perfect

Mr. Great

And Missis Square

Which one is better, you might ask;

Perhaps Herr Nowhere.

On a restless sea

You run and you run,

On the quiet stage, you practice for fun;

No one listens,

Perhaps they pretend to have ignored you

As well.

You’re tired because you just didn’t know

How to do

What he asked you to

And that was, well:

Killing yourself!

You know that this is what you’ll end-up doing if left alone.

Since God doesn’t give a damn about you anymore!

Keep running, and run for us all some more!

You’ll never be more…

Perhaps never a whore…then probably nothing at all!


Rescued by Love…

Your love!

“Seeing what he’s done to her and other people, how he looked for revenge and a way to be above us all, a god manipulating someone only to satisfy his pride, made her soul sad and worried; then, the bitter heart turned into stone and, when her time of revenge came and she was to watch him pay for what he’s done, she reacted with nothing but indifference. Cold eyes were watching his torments; she used to care and be more forgiving, kind and gentle to those who fought her. Now she is only cold and indifferent. She had no clue what she did to them to deserve being treated like that. Perhaps it was all in their heads. Perhaps they were taken somewhere else and shown what they wanted to see about her. Perhaps their prides needed to be satisfied somehow. Well, so was hers! So, there she was, watching the one who directed all this unfair terror in her life go to the great F that he deserved. “Thank you!” she said, “Thank you so much!”. Now I know why!? Because … you needed to be beautiful; Because she needed to be beautiful! Because they needed to be beautiful on the outside and able to fake the beauty of the inside of others. Then, again! It is not enough, never enough! More is never enough for them! They need more, they need some more beauty, this time the real beauty so let’s just kill them! Kill them all the beautiful and take away their souls, their inner beauty making that our own!”

~ “Blame it on us all!” ~

La Flamme Gelée

“I’m just a sinner, nothing but a sinner! I’m sorry!”

Opaque Transparency: The T teller

I blued the world

As I felt like detonating myself.

The clock was ticking and I didn’t do all that I was supposed to!

I wonder who’s to blame for that

Since I kept on

Blaming myself

For not being enough.

Now, if I tried blaming you all, the whole world,

Would that be helpful?

Oh! Wow!

No, wait!
I have already gotten the answer to that!

YOU see, I was raised… properly.

A nice picture and a frame-case I picked

To put all my soul-mates’ songs into

And let them be free.

Oh-ho! The irony and the frown,

A maniac in a song and one marionette,

Asking again to repent! Asking again to be rescued and helped!

Asking for more as if more was not enough;

She almost got killed by all that!

By her own wrath,

Her cool magic flat…

And the kingdom in her head,

The castle of: ‘The Heck I’m doing?’

Oh, yeah, I am not praying for the world!

The world is fine the way it is!

It doesn’t need the stupid kind of warriors!

Good music lit the light inside my soul!
One spring sensation and a mirrored song,

One cry imagined and a lot of foam!

The pain, the cry the sorrow…

It never happened, you know!?

How do you like this psychological call?!

Oh, but how could I be so stupid and let you know

How is that you could hurt me again,

Hurt me some more?

How could I tell you what was then,

What I wanted gone

And lost forever,

Burned down with the images of dawn.

How could I repent for what I didn’t do,

For what I couldn’t have done?

Of Rust and Lichen

Cosmos, you keeper of infinite knowledge,

I wanted to ask you: how do you find your old friend Chaos?

Do you still speak to him?

What if Chaos was a ‘she’, girl?

For the soft stones feeding a famished brain:

  • ‘Nice job!’

  • ‘great work!’

and this nonsense of you Love Job!

Good God!

Great Lord!

Healthy Universe

Please Don’t collide to an ugly end with us!

Everyone’s to blame and no one to be ashamed

Of who and what they are!

Oh, but how I love,

Lord, how I love this goodbye!

His pride! Too great for what he’s done to a girl.

Her sorrowful hatred too much for someone who’s foght against it all this time!

There was once a nice human who could have been called ‘a friend’…

Some might go even further in time and call this person

‘a dear (and the kindest ones: ‘lovable’, perhaps ‘lovely’) friend’

Forgiveness is a hell of a job, My Friend!

All holy spirits showing the path

With the help of the Light …

They do not see;

But you can feel what makes your spirit vibrate and resonate

With what once made you sick…

Their lying progress made with money

Coming in a stack that’s only thick,

Not all-knowing!

Some spirits offer a good life while others want you to toss and turn in your bed for a better living…

All this time is properly used though by the deceiving old bastards!

They have their treasures and the money you worked for but never took away

From their stinking noses,

Rotten ghost made of flesh and blood

Selling you all illusions;

Circling us all with ideas upon wealth and the perfect world!

Why would we even bother to go on if not entitled to a decent run through this life, this existence?

Why didn’t you just kill us all?

It would have been better that way so you can all rule your ‘perfect world’ all by yourselves!

I still have a prayer to the Lord:

  • “Please, allow us to see them after we’re gone! See who will kill who first from their pack of lovely rulers and diamonds deciding what happens to whom

In this world!

Sorry, Lord! I just needed some fun too, you know…”

Trust issues to be developed and shown

For everyone to have their go

For the screens.

Somehow we all get to be heroes.

Care for some medals?

On tears

Of hypocrisy and hurting feelings;

I wonder who’s out there for

A new beginning?

Pride Servants

One Prayer for the Autumn-less,

Some odes reversed,

Your thoughts and feelings multi-versed

Then everybody knows them


Of God

These nobodies you feed upon

And use for your illusions

To come back to life

And make you live

The perfect life!

How dare you!

  • Oh, how dare you, girl or dude or lady!

It was perhaps because of what you once said

Or did

Or cried yourself out with!

It was because you suffered in vain;

It’s not a good idea to tell

What’s bothering you!

Just keep it inside and let it eat you alive!

It is what they want!

You may speak out loud but careful

‘cause some eyes really watchful

can kill with a look

and give you the hook

of despair!

Psychotic romance in a pot of a Dancing Tree

Of Tea

Brings comfort to the heart;

You should re-name yourself after that

Cup of duty!

Do not worry about being too loved or cared for,

I will always be full of contempt

Towards you and the ones caring for what you do!

Then you can say it was all about you and your delicate value of human!

Remember this though:

God was never your friend,

He was never my kid,

Beloved child of cruel hopes

And disillusion!

It’s over now, that nightmare you still cling on to!

Go watch those pigeons that hang on the sky of this Dawn

Once more!

All work for me got done a long,

Long time ago!

You only couldn’t see that as enough for you to go home!

Go back there to where you belong!

… and leave me alone …

An animated mannequin,

A rocket full of moons to dance

To the tools that might get to explore

Your Universe!

Drifting down your steps, the shadows

lifting-up their faces

look shallow.

Compare the asphalt and the aura

Of your wild caverns;

Suspended gardens

On a pair of chocolate bars

Revealing silhouettes into the blissful night

Of those, much needed havens;

Oscillatory drop-tops

On top of another building.

A butler’s watering some plants,

Some hearts of sine decide to dance


Towards the right reflection

Of a meadow.

  • So, have you spoken to your friends?

Are they to bother for your fence…

Or at least the garden?

  • Oh, they’re not to be bothered! Not now, you know…

They have a lot to do, and so…

  • I bet you say this to every girl in town!

(they laugh with sullen hysteria – controlled)

  • Oh, no, no, no! Just you, darling!

We know!

The smiles they change,

politely ironical

bring the soirée to an end.

Have a nice time finding the cure and the proper tool to mend

Your secure scar!

He’s having a good time now!

Didn’t you see…

The pride on his face for what he is and what he did

To you, in the past for a future…

He thinks himself a god

While you keep being a loser!

How is that fair, Love!?

Revenge would be to overcome this situation and beat him and his entire proud hall

Of sad conclusions that were all made

In ‘good’ intention



For All!

I tried to keep my soul together, my spirit’s integrity and my faith

but I failed…

I failed myself and I have failed the world I was living in.”

I tried to keep it calm and peaceful to you all.”

~ some people really know how to get the soul out of you, though! ~


Gotta’ love them, girl!

Gotta love them all!


In the corner of the sumptuous ball-room, a table was the place for him to watch and learn about the people he got tired of watching from above; observing them from the inside was quite fun…yet tiring somehow. He kept on going there, to that place where, one day he met the lady he could not have; because she wasn’t there, she was only what he’d have loved to have; the product of his ideal thoughts on how he’ll make the perfect pair happen to him.


I’ll give you what you want!

I’ll make your wish come true!

You’ll find your peace in solitude,

You’ll find your way to school!


One day she entered the ball room and there he was, sitting at the same table, all tired and bored, indifferent somehow.

  • What are you doing now?

  • I’m joking all around!

  • That’s fun! For how long?

  • You lit the whole room when you got in, you know?

  • Well, isn’t that the perfect line to catch a fool?

  • He raised and left the room saying nothing to the fool she was.


I’ll never come back to rescue you, my friend!

Now, I do understand!


The Geisha Samurai

Opaque colourless seconds

Transformed in mountains of rainbows and sweet flavoured drops of dew.

Perfected flowers that constantly bloom

Are kept next to her bed.

“Here I am, telling you lies on how much I love you and how I’d like you to be mine! The truth is I’d just love to die for you, now because I have nothing else to do than die like a fool! This will most certainly bring me some comfortable issues to die for in my next existence as a better fool than I previously was! Still, I could never do anything to harm you; never mind my foolish words, they don’t mean anything to someone like you… but everything they do, for the perfect living.”

Melting away,

Star-sick Universes fake some new stars

that are nothing but a fist of soil and sand;

for the perfect cup of sanity, she rises again;

from her grave she brings peace

and harmony that looks concave

to someone.

A mocking flute of wind,

The iridescent sprouts

And turtles that adore

The kindness in one lie

Told just to make then bold

And hold on to their lives;

Deep down into the ocean

They live and love then die.

Délicatesse in a worshipped pot.

Enjoyed my time bathing in the magic bowl

Of good luck

And warm hearts

That’ll enjoy the presence of my spirit.

Delicacy in a pot of hopes

That once crushed made all beauty-dreams too possible.

“- Now, will you try to go for once in life

To the greatness of beauties that was brought back to life

Inside that heart of yours?!”

“- Will I…”

“As the Moon looks for ways to send flowery rays through the winds’ swirling -clouds and the silent crowds of dyes hidden by the veil of its bold cracked eyes, two stars that appeared to be lost and forgotten shone through and the blue sky turned orange then red then cold deep true blue and the light bright encounter between two good souls made Time free their minds.

“It seems that nothing matters anymore,

I feel that I lost you a long time ago!

I keep wishing for you to be happy, somehow…

I believe that your hatred towards me was only too good

To teach me the lesson on how I’d love to be:

All able to love you all again, from afar!

I wish you kept being able to love for real someone…

Wherever you go…

No matter where you go!

  • Hello!

  • Hello!

  • Hi, there! … beautiful!

“The sea got its smell into her clothes and she took it home. Then all the sea-clothes that gathered the breeze and the winds, the sounds of the waves and those of the seagulls, along with the perfect relaxation, when brought home left this perfume slide into the closet among the other clothes and all they could talk about for the whole rest of the year was the sea.

  • So, in your aesthetic conception of the soul, matter has no ability to reason out!

  • Some people tend to rip-off the soul of its ability to reason claiming that it’s all about the brains’ activity and nothing more… I’m not arguing against the necessity of the brain to be in good shape for reason to happen as it may be described by the term ‘properly’ or ‘correctly’, if you like. But I do hold my position in respects of spiritual value and perfect ability of the soul to commit reasoning. You see, for an artist the spirit will remain the mind and soul combined, united… working together as one. In my humble opinion the spirit and the soul can be seen as two terms describing the same thing; it only depends in which theoretical stream you find yourself playing or developing your activities.

  • Kind lady, this conversation would never end if I weren’t this tired and helplessly in debt to my duty as a warrior first and head of our beloved brave army taking us to the highest peaks of glory and fame! Tomorrow I’ll have to lead this country to victory so, I shall leave you with the warmest thoughts and the petals of those roses you so much seem to love! Goodnight!

  • Goodnight …good-heart of stone (she added to herself when his steps told her he was far away into the garden O.).”

Revenge is ours, though!

Because I cannot like this,

Cannot like this anymore!

  • Hello!

  • Hello!

  • Oh, hi! Hello!

  • Hey, there, beautiful!

Poof! You made me a star!”

Poof, now I’m gone with the destinies of all suns!”

- Give to the world what the world wants! Said the brilliant scientinst. If they want apes then apes they shall be given; apes that are evolving into a brilliant new human. Give them a shower and a place to live, so that they felt kind enough and superior to you. Give them a nice hose, an even nicer later. Who cares you have no real place for them to find their egos perfectly aware of dangers? Protect the apes and protect your people! The world is just the way you wanted it to happen! It’s nature, isn’t it?

  • You flew higher than the stars living their heavenly lives, didn’t you?

  • Isn’t highest the lowest, dear?

  • It should depend… on each individual strength and power of will!

  • Your’s is quite nice, my dear!

  • Nice is a fine word for a fine day right here and now. This moment is fun!

~ For everyone, not for everyone! ~

  • Should it be…? Interrupted the silence following.

  • What?

  • When did the world get itself so crowded with gods of all kid?

  • I bet you loved history a lot, dear!

  • I guess I did!

  • I guess we all need to find the perfect end… to all this theory of a movement and the movement in the palm of a hand talking to a stranger, talking to our beloved sound-cloud. “

“Seeing what she’s done to the world she cared a bout was probably not the reason of her cries but the reason of her faith in that God who wasn’t understood by many the way she managed to understand… It was felt and cared about because it was all about here; in the end, it was all about everyone and no one. It was about everything that ever happened and that was to happen to the world. She preferred to leave not only out of pride but out of the crazy wish to see a better world happen and know that she was part of that ‘best’ any human being is actually looking for.

  • Was that such a wrong thing? The wrong type of pride? A wrong decision? What went wrong, dear? What was so wrong about you and me? About them?

  • The fact that we couldn’t rise above them all and become like them: PROUD!”

There she was, sitting in silence, not moving a muscle as his steps were moving further away; inside, her soul was desperately crying for help. She couldn’t bother anymore.

~ Now that’s a man! ~

  • I could not care, I wouldn’t care!

  • You wouldn’t listen to what I had to say!

  • You didn’t care!

  • So what if I actually give a damn!?

~ Now that is the man! ~

“You never loved her or anyone else in the whole wide world! It was all about your money and your fame, your glory and your greatness on the screen! Why should I be this stupid now and care? Why shoud I be blown-up in the air for you and your needs and your plans? Why should I be sacrificed again? For the sake of your bloody hell? No, thank you! I’d rather struggle in vain to conquer the world and lead all wars to the end!”

~ “Proud of who we are, dear! We’re all prud of who we are!” ~

Humiliation Avenue

The math, the scent, the tears…

A couple of ears and two eye that aren’t willing to see

What we’ve prepared for today!

Hey, sister! Would you see us!?

Hey, teacher! Could you care about us?!

Hey brothers, did you ever embraced a cruel song

And let it tear apart your entire soul?

An arbiter of splendour

Was sitting on a bench,

In silence waiting for his times

To come and take away

All pains.

An arbiter for love and your great dance


I was never good enough for you,

Never doing what you wanted me to do,

I’m quite proud of that right now

Since it kept me away from that pesky debt you had to carry on with!”

Eternal dance of love

And passion for the poor

That’s rich in kind but sorrowful unreachable goals!

  • I can only guess that you got tired of it,

this struggle!

Mocking me was the greatest thing, you know dear?

Yes, yes, do not bother to explain it to me:

How I am not ‘your dear’ and you couldn’t be… yes, yes,

I agree!

Just call me too proud or too bitchy!

I guess you all know the paths to take

To be like Richie!

(Get rich! If you’re rich, Get richer!)

I’m sorry to have gotten

All, used with everything.

This place, this time and failures

Of the lowest kind

All, put together by what I used to call a master-plan!

I’m sorry to have gotten this sore tautology too etched to my old cruel mind!

I need a fresh one!

‘Keep wandering:

  • Who knows, now, who cares about our grip!?

I’m sorry, yet I’m not quite

All sad and sorry, dear; see…

I’m there and guessing well, now,

That you got tired of it all!

Got tired to recall…

  • Wasn’t that maybe just a fun amazing goal?

The echoes still belong to…,

Them echoes still recall,

My Action!

Two dots on a sot verticality

Asking for more:

Destroy all the planet, destroy us all!

We got tired of living

What you wouldn’t call

Neither life nor living!

Two dots for a fellow and one for my soul;

Two, one after the other and the third in a row;

it sometimes separates two types of worlds.

  • I am feeling a bit sad and disappointed; I must have felt that I was much more and much better than I really am!

  • I understand, we all get to feel tired and crushed sometimes. Just don’t let anyone get to you! Many will try to hurt you. Just don’t let them do that again, that’s all!”

A penny for the poor,

Starvation for a fool

Trying to live a life

According to the rules

Of saints!

  • You’re not a saint, you girl-dude!

  • And even if you were! What do you think it’ll serve you for?

  • We’re all above and helping each-other!

While you all think it’s better that way… the poor way! Than what? Our struggle?

Oh, please! Give me a break! We do not struggle!

Are you much more of a man now?

Oh, pardon me, I was such a fool back then, to trust you

And to love you with all my ‘rotten’ soul!

This cold forgotten soul…

Are you much prouder than before?

Are you successful?

I know I know! I admired your entire carrier,

You, kind and nice good girl!

I should probably kill myself, just now

But I guess that I am too god damn proud

To do so.

Are you still proud of your soul and your wonderful goal?

I know that I am of mine!

I should probably commit suicide.

But not until I get less ashamed with who I am;


Too close to someone else’s sun!

~ I Mean the loser someone planned to make of me and got to make me be! ~

Much too carefully!

Much too shamefully!


Oh, my!

The Freak-in’ Carbonite kicked in!

I must get it out on the screen!

After that I’ll try to organize those showers for the angels;

Propeller pins and cosy sins

Already happening

why bother?

It’s on them!

Brutally honest with myself:

I find my old journals a bunch of idiotic steam material.

God, I hate myself for not being… stronger!

Yet I must confess:

I love myself more than anything in the world!

“I’ll be the spit in your face if I have to!

she yelled back at him

You traitor!

  • You must be joking now, dear!

a choir they join both saying:

  • Aurevoir, dear!

I prostrate myself

In front of your greatness,

Too grateful for the little I got to accomplish

And give thanks to the Greatest of Lords!


“Are you much more of a man now, that you killed them all, those victims?”

A missing point that was completely unknown

To the public

Got out meeting people and feeling them all

Just like a believer.

“I need you and I want to be needed too!

I Miss You!

A moon and a missing point looking for sun warmth and half a cup of solitude.

Tricky traps,

Mickey snacks,

joyful cups

filled with chocolate cream

and a straw that is trying to sip in

the cube of an ice-cream.

So, this was my stand for one show in one life for many to follow! (she was watching her face very carefully while cleaning the whites and reds of her make-up). This is all that I had to say for now about my holy life as ‘The Geisha Samurai’; some matters of my holy life as a sinner were a bit flourished. Still, everything belongs to the truth that is greater than all of us! I liked being a fighter and ask for much more than what I gained in return; I used to think better of myself and the world; I used to be confident and think myself strong and beautiful. I used to believe that what we do does matter to our gods, to your angels, to the Lord and his people… to OUR God! How is that the world got herself so crowded with lords of all kind?

This stage and the humiliation machine… racines, des racines pour nous sauver de cette machine !

I’m finding my way out of this stage, now;

I have to clean-up my face!

Getting out of bed and trying to focus on my work!

The curious shades and colours on my face

Put me on the list of the famous.

One flame!

~ I sometimes imagine burning the of traitors my lawyers with the light of a candle ~

About right now I am cleaning my face

And I must confess that I loved you!

It is the only way for me to leave this behind

And start to focus

On my life.

This stage and our rehearsal times,

Humiliation for the blind and beautiful!

I will come back one day, I know,

Perhaps just on a different road

I do not know now how and when,

Nor why …

but can I feel a faint regret.

It shall be broken and exposed,

It will feel damaged and will carry tears on petals of a red rose.

Those times I dedicate them all to my old traitors!

Now, here I am, saying goodbye

Having in mind

That image of my return

On a different road

On this old stage that’s been built

On the expense of my humiliation avenue

And a great friend.


counting the multiplied new versions of her lost shares

she realises that nothing was against her and her pair of costumes

for another masquerade.


Perhaps I wasn’t such a good friend.

"I still can't believe how stupid I was

 to tell you how to hurt me, 

Once more... “ she crawled and got out the sad sound of her voice 

she threw back at him from deep down within.

The Soul is to be loved,

The mind to be admired, Love!

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(Pages 1-58 show above.)